Something green with long legs was moving on the shiny linoleum of a big box store. Who knows how he got there, but this bright green grasshopper-type katydid was disoriented and destined to be crunched by a cricketcidal matron or kid. I scooped him up and took him outside to the ornamental bushes on the side of the building. This demonstrates that I am not a killer; remember that.

My bathroom has become a spider suburb, an offshoot of the city-living spiders on the Outside of the Screen. Little wee uns, middle size mamas, and long shinned daddies are pouring into my, My bathroom way beyond allowable limits set by our government. The window screen has separated from the frame, and a miniature neon arrow lights up at night, pointing the way in. It will cost about $22 to get fixed, it is not something at the top of the list for the landlord to fiddle with.

I have a favorite hardware shop run by a family who will reinforce the thing with super strong screening tough enough to deflect a kick from a Clydesdale. No tricky spider fingers will be able to peel this baby back so the family can crawl under the fence. The others that are trying to move in will face the Vortex Spider Suckomatic vacuum hose to a debris laden death. Oh, wait.

The vacuum cleaner I have is a bagless model, so the critters will Not be sucked into a bag, but will swirl around with the cat hair and dirt and possibly dine on dust mite suppers and come out of the situation hardier and more robust. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger may apply to this situation. There could be some pissed off prisoners ready to rumble when I empty out the plastic canister. Remember this, too, when you purchase a bagless model; you may have to face the bugs you just vacuumed and apologize.

The bug spray I have only slows them down. It says right on the label "spiders" but when used, the spider disappears for a day and then returns with a stronger immune system, whilst I gasp and get visions of Mexico upon inhalation. Hairspray stickies them up and induces them to sing "And Ah Am Tellin' You, Ah'm Not Going" from Dreamgirls.

This will not go on much longer, Monday I will dislodge the frame and wipe off the millenia of spider detritus before taking it in to the hardware. Then the screenless window will be invitation for every Tom Dick and Harry arachnid to slip in between the other outside screen and the window. No, no, this isn't a big deal, I'll get through it with rubber gloves and chocolate. Maybe some dark sponge candy, which I never knew wasn't available in other parts of the country until my friends started asking me to send some out.

There have been storms, downpours, on and off all day, with brilliant sunshine inbetween. You would walk past yards just soaked with rain, yet remain dry, it was over that quick. Makes you breathe. I missed the GardenWalk but in the Elmwood Village, there are many front yards burgeoning with flowers wet from the sudden showers. I saw a puppet show today by an artist who performed as part of the Infringement Festival. She does the work of six geniuses, this woman of electric blue eyes; it was going to the performance with friends which caused me to be up in the Village among some of the gardens. No spiders were evident among the blooms.

This evening calls for more showers; two of the cats growl when the winds kick up. Myself, I enjoy the rain and look for the clouds that come in off the lake. Sleep easily and blessed. Find some clean jammies. Close your eyes. Let night come.